7 Relationship Myths Busted

By Kel | 15-May-09 in Dating

If you’re looking for a “perfect” relationship – the first thing you need to do is stop believing that relationships can be “perfect”. Every normal relationship has its ups and downs; happy times and low times. When you’re looking for love, you need to be open-minded so don’t get trapped into believing these myths about relationships.

Love Is All You Need
Yes you need love and lots of it. But sadly it’s not all you need because other everyday matters like work, money, kids etc are bound to affect your relationship at some point. Differences in opinion about other important life stuff can put love on the backseat. A healthy relationship starts out with love but then you have to have similar thoughts on other life issues as well.

There Are No Fights In A Healthy Relationship
I hate it when couples say “We never argue”…a good relationship needs conflict! No you don’t need to tear each other’s hair out but disagreeing about some stuff is very normal. Just imagine how boring it is to be with someone who agrees with everything you say and do, all the time. The friction between a couple can lead to greater passion. After all, the best part of a fight is making up!

We Have To Have The Same Interests
It’s sort of similar to the point above – you’d be bored if your partner was exactly the same as you. Sure its great if couples have the same interests and do everything together. But “same interests” is not a prerequisite to instant happiness. A couple can have different interests, hobbies, passions and still be totally in love with each other. So when you’re out there looking, don’t just say no to someone because you don’t have common interests. You might still be perfect for each other.

We Don’t Need Physical Intimacy
Not true. Every couple needs it. Sex is important for many couples because that physical passion brings them closer together. For others, just being affectionate with hugs, cuddles, holding hands etc keeps them going. The physical intimacy can make couples feel closer to each other so a relationship that’s completely devoid of any physical closeness and intimacy can be hard on one or both partners in a relationship.

I Just Need To Change Him/Her
First of all – stop deluding yourself will you. Your happiness does not depend on this relationship or your partner – it’s all about you. So telling yourself that your relationship will be “perfect” once your partner is “changed” is nothing short of stupid. Your partner isn’t a project that needs to be worked on. If you’re not happy with them the way they are – you need to move on.

We Can’t Be Attracted To Others
So you’re telling me that just because you’re in a relationship and in “love”, you will suddenly stop believing that Hugh Jackman isn’t sexy or Angelina Jolie isn’t all that? Being in love doesn’t just make everyone else unattractive and expecting that is plain silly. Girls, your boyfriend might think the waitress is cute and boys, your girlfriend probably thought the guy who walked past had a hot bod. It’s normal to find others attractive. As long as the attraction is just “appreciating” beauty and not “wanting” the other person, at the cost of hurting your partner – its very normal.

I Will Meet “The One” If I Just Wait
Oh come on! Is “the one” supposed to just fall out of the sky holding a sign that says “I’m The One”? How are you going to know if you don’t get out there and meet a few people? Waiting around for Mr. or Ms. Perfect is the stupidest thing you can do. Meet new people, date some…and somewhere along the way you’ll probably find your match.

Expect less and just spend your time meeting new people. Let a relationship take its own course and don’t pressure it with mythical expectations


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